If only I didn't make things more complicated than they need to be. This is the predicament I am in: I feel as though I need to do something (there is a specific thing on my mind but I am not going to disclose it, so bear with me) but I don't know when to do it. I mean, I formulated a plan, which can be difficult enough when so many feelings are involved. Waiting is, perhaps, the most difficult part. The plan has been made, and it is such a good plan, but the waiting is absolutely killing me. But I know, I have to hold on. I know that if I make a move before the already decided upon time I will ruin the plan altogether. So I suppose in the mean time I will have to deal with myself. I have been mulling over this the entire day and it is driving me crazy. I have 4 more days to wait. I should be all super excited about my birthday, but for the first time ever, all I want is for my birthday to pass so it can be Friday morning already. And then there is the concern that some part of the plan will not go how I expect it to. There is really only one factor that could be a big concern if it doesn't play out how I imagine it to.....and then there is a second part that I really hope turns out a certain way, but I am expecting the opposite. Always expect the worst, that way you cannot get hurt. That is one of the things I've never known whether to believe or not. In this case, I am going to choose to believe it. Seems like sound advice if I don't want to destroy myself, maybe that is what I am headed for anyway. I guess I will find out on Friday. Currently, I am sitting at my desk. I should be typing a two-page essay, or emailing a professor, or emailing my boss, or finishing my internship proposal, or figuring how to register for a class tomorrow, or at very least finishing the drawing that is in progress. But of course, I am not doing any of those things because my style is more of a wait-until-the-last-minute kind.
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