A new leaf

I am inspired to write today, for i feel that the new leaf I have turned over deserves to be written about. The last month of my life is like i turned around and started in a completely new direction, one that i may have traveled on quite some time ago and somehow got lost. I'm quite happy to have found my way again. I've learned that sometimes in order to embraced the change you need in your life you have to take some risks and make some unexpected decisions. Just deciding one day to buy a ticket to Los Angeles was apparently just what i needed to wake myself up from the proverbial sleep I'd been immersed in. I don't mean to say this to knock the last few years, I say it simply because it is the truth. 
                  I deeply appreciate the simplest things now. I feel closer to knowing myself now than i have in a long time, i feel in control and it is wonderful. I was driving to my grandparents house the other day and I was admiring the beautiful fall leaves and the sunshine like I'd never seen them before in my life. I think about the fact that my grandfather is doing so well only 3 days after having brain surgery and it's like nothing in the world has mattered so much, and nothing could drag me down. Instead of just being complacent to what i want and making my decision based so firmly on someone else I can actually just think about myself and be selfish in a way that is 100% acceptable, in my opinion.